By Troy Harrison
Last week, I made a trip to work with a client in Central California, doing a Sales Audit. It was a great trip for many reasons, but one of the greatest was this. That area is San Francisco 49ers country. The Niners just lost the Super Bowl to the Chiefs (wait – should I have said “The Big Game” so the NFL doesn’t sue me?). Which meant that, for the first time in quite a while, people didn’t ask me “How about those Chiefs!” when they met me and found out that I’m from Kansas City, so I didn’t have to talk football!
Don’t get me wrong – I don’t dislike the Chiefs, nor do I dislike football. I’m a good Kansas Citian, and I’m glad they won. I just don’t eat, sleep, and breathe it, and when people attempt to build rapport with me by starting a conversation that way, they are assuming that I do. Most likely, they don’t care much about the Chiefs either – it’s just a fake way of building rapport. And that’s the problem; entirely too many salespeople attempt to build rapport in a way that is inauthentic and actually hurts your potential rapport with customers and prospects. The good news is that there’s a real way of building rapport, so let’s talk about it.
I should tell you that I’ve always felt that rapport-building is the weakest part of my sales skills. Don’t get me wrong, I like people, but I’m not one of those guys who can be someone’s friend within 30 seconds. I knew one of those guys in the car business, and coming from him it was the most natural thing ever. He was great. When I try to build rapport by doing the old “spot their interests” tactic, it comes off like Jack Lemmon in Glengarry Glen Ross. It’s painful.
However, there’s one fact that works in my favor. I’m curious by nature. I like to ask questions. And I know one simple element of human nature. The thing that most people like to talk about is themselves. When someone is trying to get me to talk about football (or Kansas City barbecue – the other topic that people always bring up when they find out where I’m from), they are making an assumption that those things are things I’m passionate about.